Gwen Hammond's Upper Echelon

I am Gwen Hammond, scarf designer, CEO, and founder of the Chatillon-sur-Glane Leisure Group. If you'd like a full colour catalogue of my fashions, please send an email.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Hammond Corp. to Raise Extremely Rare White-headed and Laysan Ducks

Friends, and fellow foie gras aficionados who happen to live in the Chicago area, it gives me great pleasure to announce the Hammond Corporation's recent acquisition of an extensive plot of land and 2,000 endangered ducks.

In response to Chicago's ban, I have decisively taken action against these Vegenazis by illustrating just how easy it is to slight them. Veganista Terrorist activities harm the good people of our society and Chicago's latest decision to ban foie gras is nothing less than a slap in the face.

Fear not. Hammond Corp has decisively taken action against these vile liberals and their absurd agenda. I have secured the purchase of 1,000 extremely rare White-headed ducks and 1,000 relict Laysan ducks for the production of foie gras, the likes of which the world has never seen...or tasted. The White-headed ducks are being shipped at this very moment (so exciting!) all the way from the brackish marshes of Lake Ismarida, Greece. With a total world population at only 15,000 these darlings should taste magnificent! The Laysan ducks are only a stone's throw away...right in our very own Pacific Islands. With these two exotic choices, you can't go wrong.

Don't believe the hype!!! Ignore those VT's and their liberal agenda. Here is what one intelligent consumer had to say:
“It does bother me the way it’s raised, but then my grandfather raised cattle in Kansas, so I’m very aware of what farm life is like,” said Pati Heestand, a retired graphic designer and foie gras aficionado.

Hammond Corp is committed to the preservation of luxury and acquired tastes world-wide. Interested buyers: please email.

Gwen Hammond
CEO, Hammond Corp.

1 Comments:

  • At 12:35 PM, Blogger Richard Quick, Millionaire said…

    God Bless you, Gwen, and the good work you are doing. There're worse things to be shoved down your gullet than a forced-feeding tube... like the Vegenista propaganda we're force-fed daily. These liberal airheads are just jealous because they blew all their money on candles, tofu and books. Because they can't afford the finer delicacies they want to spoil it for the rest of us.

    But we will not be deterred. No matter how many laws they pass, we can always abduct our livestock to countries with no laws regarding animal cruelty and and soon be harvesting extraordinary renditions of our favorite foods with impunity.

    Viva Buon Appetite!

    Richard Quick, Esq.

     

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